dreams

I was adopted, and talented in voice. My adopted parents did everything they could to get me into Julliard. It worked. My first day there we are all given instructions "how to find your dorm". The halls are full of lost students. One picks up her violin and starts to play "I could have danced all night." Another violin joins. Then someone starts to sing along. The halls are suddenly full of dancing, singing, playing students like something straight out of a musical.

A 3rd year girl tells me she's seen me before. My dream suddenly becomes mysterious. Could it be a clue as to my past? She takes me through long halls with locked doors. Finally we come upon a library. She finds the book she was looking for. She ruffles through. Among the published short story authors is Teri Duchaine. Only they spelt her name wrong..Duchane.

She doesn't find what she's looking for. She works there, tells me to come back later. I feel a bond with her for some reason.

Flash

I'm in a house. My house. I feel like someone is trying to get to me. I lock the door of the room behind me and find a knife. Suddenly, I notice it's slightly open. I open the door and peek into the hall and I see my teddy bear, trying to walk on his feet. He can only take a few steps then he falls down. I walk up to him and ask him where he is going. He says it's been a long time but it's time for him to return to the store.

silver lining.

I've noticed that since I've been off my BC and Prozac I haven't been in a generally happy mood. MOstly I've been tired and slightly annoyed. However I feel smarter if that is possible.

I'd take happy over smarter most days though. Not that I'm unhappy. I'm just worried about feeling down or annoyed or angry so I'm paranoid about being unhappy. I'm worried about it. Ugh I should just go back on my meds I guess.

I got my health insurance card in the mail today. Going to go online and check to see what doctors I can see. I need to get back on it to lose weight at the least..dating matt has fattened me up. The man wants to eat out every night.

Working is going well. I like most of my managers and such and I made 500 in 2.5 days..so that's good. I'm moving out. I started looking for apartments in New Orleans. I want to live by myself and do whatever the hell I want.