I think what generally makes us unhappy is going over our past over and over. Generally I can choose (most of the time, unless someone I love is involved) to be happy in the present, or not. The future is mostly all happy, because I can't go over it with a fine-toothed comb.
I find I alternate in my life between long stretches of reading and then long stretches of writing. Right now I'm engaged in the reading section. Everything I read leads me to something else, so I don't anticipate this ending at any time. I finished a book on near death experiences and I can't stop thinking about it. It made me believe (almost) in an afterlife.
My mom asked me the other day if I ever feel my dad's post-mortem "presence". No, but I feel Theron. A lot, sometimes more vividly than others.
I'm very scared about the next year, for numerous reasons. I will be diving head first into a career I'm about 100 percent sure I won't be satisfied with unless I get my masters. Even then I'm not 100 percent sure. I'm doing it for the money, and that scares me. It's high burn out--will I even have the energy to get my masters? I HAVE to.
Shaina is leaving for France. I won't be going to Italy, Montenegro, and Turkey till next summer. It's a long way to stay in one place.
Not sure what's going on, but I need something.
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